The Past I Never Knew
by thoughtsandnothings
Summary: Tossed aside by her village, the human Amu is sacrificed to be bride to an evil, abusive demon. During a raid on the palace, Amu escapes by the hand of an even colder demon. With a tentative traveling arangement, Amu is swept up in the adventures of Lord Sesshomaru, learning more about herself in the process than she planned . Sesshomaru x OC
1. Chapter 1: Almost A Bride

**Author's Note: Yes, I'm a bad bad person who's starting yet another fanfiction. I just can't seem to stop myself. I'm going to update all my other little fics, but i thought I'd let you all check out my newest. This story was created due to a contest entry. I had to draw Sesshomaru with an OC and ended up loving the OC too much. So here she is! Amu Miyahara. Pics of her can be found on my DeviantArt account. Names Ria-Starlin and there's a link on my Profile.**

**Enjoy!  
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"Hyah!" My scream echoed across the dojo as I threw my fist hard, excited as it met with a hard body. The accomplished feeling vanished as a foot connected with my face and I felt the light metallic taste in my mouth. Angrily, I wiped my hand across my cheek before spitting blood.

"Jun! I thought we agreed, no face shots?" I yelled, grabbing my older brother by the front of his shirt. He shrugged his shoulders, raising his hands in a defensive pose.

"Heh heh, sorry Amu I...uh...forgot." He chuckled nervously and I shoved him roughly against the wall.

"Bull." I said flatly and Jun's face got darker.

"Well, of course that's a lie. In a real fight, Amu, the opponent isn't going to avoid your face." My brother's tone was haughty as he tried to lecture me and I tried to suppress a yawn, failing. Of course, this only made him angry. "Do you think this is funny? I'm giving you great advice here! If I didn't know better, I'd think you weren't taking me seriously."

"Oh no! Please, Master Jun, teach me more." Sarcasm coated my every word and my brother caught onto it quick, glaring angrily. "I'm sorry, but it doesn't make sense that I , the better fighter would take advice from you."

"You're not better than me yet, Amu!" His words were forceful, but both Jun and I knew the statement was a lie.

"If it helps you sleep at night..." I trailed, stopping my sentence as a foot nearly collided with my face once again. Using both hands, I grabbed the barefoot and twisted forcefully throwing Jun to the ground. There was a painful thump that I ignored, placing a foot over his chest.

"I told you, no face shots." My voice was low and enforcing. Jun looked slightly scared before manly pride took over and he began ranting.

"Damn it, Amu, this is just too much! It's humiliating to throw you're older brother to the ground and immeasurably disrespectful. You should be ashame-"

"Miyahara- san!" There was a loud bang as Satsuki came bursting into the dojo, cutting off my brothers pointless rant. Flowing brown hair trailed behind her as she ran quickly to me, tears in her forest green eyes.

"Satsuki-chan what's wrong?" I asked the beautiful girl. Satsuki and I had been friends since we were young. Of course, the differences between us were large. She was the daughter of the town lord and I was the daughter of a shop owner. Still, we'd always been close. It worried me to see her crying.

"Miyahara-san it's...it's..." Satsuki stuttered, choking on tears.

"It's Amu, Satsuki. Please, tell me what's wrong?" I reminded the girl as she cried harder, eyes bright with tears.

"It's the Elders. They've...they've chosen the bride." She muttered, gaining a little composure.

"Yes, and who have they chosen? Surely it was Chiyo, the prettiest of us?" Satsuki looked up at me, pure devastation in her eyes as she shook her head.

"No....not Chiyo..." She placed a hand over her mouth like a lady as she sobbed harder. I lost my patience.

"Who is it Satsuki!" I yelled, startling her.

"You Amu....It's You!"

For a moment the world stopped. It was as if suddenly I'd fallen of a large cliff and I had the gut wrenching feeling of having no control. I could barely mumble a 'what' before Jun began pulling me towards the Elders hut. There was faint whimpers behind us as Satsuki followed close behind, crying in a ladylike manner.

Of course, by the time I reached the Elders all shock had worn off completely. All that was left was rage. In the room were the five elders, Satsuki's father, and my own family. There was a slight crowd of villagers gathered in the room as well, most likely overcome by curiosity.

"Ah. Amu Miyahara. You've arrived sooner than expected. Have a seat." The High Village Elder spoke to me, motioning me a seat. The man was very old with wrinkles covering his entire body, but his cunning and condescending demeanor had not diminished.

"I'll stand." I said roughly forcing my way through the crowd to my parents. My mother was teary eyed, but my father sat firm and unaffected.

"Amu..." She reached a delicate hand to touched my shoulder, which I shoved off.

"How can you agree to this? You're going to sacrifice me to that demon?!" I yelled, glaring at the both of them.

"Do not speak to your mother in that tone." My father demanded, his voice firm and uncaring. It wasn't unusual. I had never received love or caring from my father as my brother and sister had. His actions towards me were always callous and uncaring, as if he hated my presence. I was sure this decision had made him happier than anyone else.

"You've lost the right to tell me what to do, Father." I growled, looking straight into his eyes in defiance before turning to my mother. "Please, Mother. Don't make me do this. Can't I stay with our Grandparents? Surely there is someone more fit-"

"Amu Miyahara." The voice of the High Elder interrupted and I turned angrily to face him. "There will be no negotiating this decision. You have been chosen by all five elders as the most suitable bride-elect for Ryuunosuke-sama."

"How can that be. The demon asked for a woman of our village to suite his taste. As a woman, surely another of greater beauty would be better!" I yelled, trying to keep composure. The Elders all shook their heads, simultaneously.

"In beauty, Chiyo and Tsukiko surpass you, though you follow close behind. In grace and elegance, Satsuki and Michiko exceed you, though you follow close behind them as well. In the art of dance Hana excels over you and in healing Suzume, though not by much. However, your voice is the most brilliant of our women and your skills in fighting only below the General and high ranking men.

"But of all our women to lose, your talents will be less missed. A singer is not needed for a bride and a woman cannot be a fighter. Yet your skills are more than passable for the bride of a demon." The old man's face was set with determination as he finished speaking. There was an immediate darkening of my mood.

"And my honorable parents agree with this?" I asked, respectful and emotionless.

"In its entirety." My father responded, not to my surprise.

"No, Amu!" My mother cried, but a firm hand upon her own from my father silenced her. I nodded.

"I understand." Feelings of hatred, sadness, and betrayal were strong in me, but I kept my voice cold. I would not give my father or the Elders that satisfaction.

"Excellent. The women will help to prepare you for this evening. When the moon and sun are both in the sky, you will wait by the sacred spring. He will meet you there."

The multiple layered red dress made walking a difficult task, especially in the forest. Villagers had watched me leave, safe inside the town as I disappeared into the forest. Satsuki had stood towards the front and weeped as Jun held her close. His face was grim and the most serious I'd ever seen him. Neither my parents nor my sister had been present.

Immediately after the women had finished dressing me in a 'brides' attire, my mother had come to me. She had always been a beautiful woman, with an air of incomparable grace surrounding her tall, slender figure. But when she'd approached me her long waves of auburn were lacking their normally intricate style, hanging defeatedly around her and her dark blue eyes were slightly red from crying.

_"Amu." She had called to me, my name almost a moan. Coldly, my eyes had met hers._

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"What." I'd asked flatly, my tone curt as I packed a small bag._

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"Amu...this was unavoidable. I tried to sway this decision. You must believe that it was not my choice nor will to have you leave!" She pleaded slightly, holding onto the doorway's frame in which she stood._

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"Mother, why have our last words be lies?" I asked, and my words rose more tears in her eyes._

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"I speak the truth, my daughter! This was beyond my control." A fair arm touched mine. "I believe in you. You will be able to live well with even a demon like Ryuunosuke. You....you have more in common with his kind than you'd think."_

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"What do you mean?" I asked my mother, confused._

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"There's something...special about you, Amu." She smiled through tears at me, and odd look of pride on her face. "You look so beautiful. A fitting bride."_

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"Save your breath, mother. I'm sure my honorable father is more than happy to have me leave." I kept my tone cold and my mother's eyes widened._

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"N-no! Amu he just....it's not..."_

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"He has never cared for me as he does Jun and Nao. I'm not stupid mother. I'm sure he was in complete cheering for the Elders to send me." As I said these words my mother slid down onto the ground, crying harshly. "I've no reason to stay here any longer. The time has come for me to leave."_

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My mother looked up at me from the floor, panic in her eyes. She clutched one of my skirts layers, holding it in a feeble grasp._

_  
"No, Amu! Do not leave like this!" She cried desperately, but I easily shook of her grasp._

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"You will not watch me leave will you?" I asked what I already knew, my tone accusing. My mothers face was tear stained and red as she nodded, her expression much like a criminal caught in the act. I nodded curtly, any love I'd had previously for her gone._

_  
"I'm leaving now. My husband waits." I spat the words 'husband' as my mother shook. I would have left with that, if my mothers actions hadn't disturbed me so._

_  
"Stop sniveling on the floor. You look pitiful. The woman I knew was strong." She looked up quickly, eyes wide with surprise and shock, but this time I really did leave._

I harbored now a great sense of hatred for everyone in that village, save Jun and Satsuki. Even as I'd made my way through the crowd, forfeiting my life as a sacrifice for them and their protection, whispers had surrounded me. Awful words of hate and malicious.

"It's good it was her, she never would have amounted to much."

"Who would'a known she'd look this good all fancied up."

"Either way, we're better off without her. We still have plenty of beauties."

"Besides, she has that 'blood' in her."

"I heard that was a rumor."

"No good chancing it."

Disgusting little whispers among both men and women. Even now, they scorned me for my family ties. I knew not why I received hatred for my mother's blood when she herself did not. All I knew was that the Elders had always held some sort of spite towards me. In a way, leaving this village would be a relief.

The demon Ryuunosuke had come to our village a month ago. He was the large demon who 'ruled' over the area in which our village was located. His appearance was not the worst according to rumors and there were some women who admired him based only on this. But his actions and manners were horrid. Ryuunosuke was a rough and careless demon with morals, I thought, must have been low.

Even so, he'd 'protected' our village from outer attacks. Or, at least, that's what he claimed. I'd had to fight to many lesser demons to really believe this demon was doing any sufficient amount of guarding. But this was not the reason we did as he bid. The Elders knew that we could never defeat such a powerful demon as Ryuunosuke.

The time had come, one month ago, where Ryuunosuke visited our village. He came to us, speaking only to the Elders, demanding a wife suitable for his status by the next month. It was not random or luck that he'd chosen our village. It was common knowledge in the areas surrounding that the village of Allekar was populated with beautiful women. It was just a trait in our genes. So it was no wonder that Ryuunosuke wanted an Allekarian woman for his bride.

It had been left upon the Elders to choose just who that bride would be and, after 'much' deliberation I had been chosen. The idea that the Bride would be treated well and live by Ryuunosuke's side as his wife was not believed by anyone, and certainly not me. I knew that going to such a man would ultimately lead to the lose of my purity and then death.

The sacred spring glowed orange with the setting sun and the moons reflection could just barely be seen. I stood, waiting for someone who's face I knew naught, my feet and body heavy though I dared not seat. It would be an immediate disadvantage for my 'husband-to-be' to find me in such a position, and respect would surely decrease.

So I stood, hands folded respectfully in front of me and waited. Every moment or so I would shift, uncomfortable with having to stand in awkward still and silence. My emotions were all riled inside my body and mind, and I was afraid of the reaction I'd have when provoked.

There was a burst of powerful wind from the north and it blew my hair and clothes back harshly. I groaned, moving to fix the ruffles in my skirt and tuck back the misplaced strands of hair. Even as I did so, a burst more powerful than the first added to the damage. And in the midst of swirling leaves and wind was the man I assumed to be my husband.

The style of his clothes were movable, yet elegant in an overly decorative pattern with rich tones, obviously flaunting the fact that he was financially secure. There was a minimal amount of armor covering the dark red clothing, but on the demons tan skin a shine reflected occasional scales. Though of course, it was not his attire that would attract women to him.

Looking towards his face, even I had to acknowledge the demon Ryuunosuke had some attractive features. Black hair fell straight to his collarbone, though most of it had been tied back in a short ponytail. What seemed to be an orangedragon marking snaked up his neck from under the kimono top he wore. The foremost unsettling thing about my new 'husband' was the dangerous look of his eyes. They were the yellow-green color of most reptilian eyes I'd seen, with the same black slit. And those eyes were looking at me as if I was a meal.

"Are you the lucky girl sent to me from that village?" Ryuunosuke asked, rudely.

"If you are the demon Ryuunosuke, then yes." I replied, a bit of bite in my voice. I was going to die anyway. No reason for me to be extremely kind to a rude demon.

"You don't know of the demon in front of you, girl? You are not aware of the face of your husband?" He exclaimed, apparently shocked that a sheltered village girl like myself didn't automatically know him.

"I haven't seen many demons, and I certainly havn't met you before. Though, now I'd have to assume you're the demon I'm supposed to wed." I stated, slightly annoyed at the demons arrogance.

"Indeed I am." Ryuunosuke said grinning, stepping closer and closer to me. Instincts screamed at me to run, but I stayed, my feet rooted to the ground. This was where I had to be, whom I must be with . There was no place to run.

He circled me, like a wolf circling its prey, sizing me up. Occasionally he would grunt or make other odd noises. The sounds did nothing for my nerves, putting me all the more on edge. I'd been angry before, but this demon had managed to make me angrier, and now, alert. _'Don't be rash, Amu. Hold it in. Hold it in.'_

There was a pressure on my behind as layers of clothing were being lifted. I snapped. Instinctively, my right foot pushed as my left foot swung around, kicking the demon square in the face with as much force as I had. Ryuunosuke did not fall but stumbled back in a sort of stupor. That feels much better. Or at least, it had felt better, until I realized my actions.

The demon stood a few feet away from me, eyes wide with surprise and mouth curled in anger, his cheek reddening. There were a few moments of silence where we simply stared at each other, him in anger and I in fear. His hand moved slowly, or at least slowly to me, and I felt my life's end approaching._ 'Well done, Amu. You're going to die after only meeting your future husband. Single. You're gonna die single. Poor, pathetic you.'_ Only I didn't die.

In the next moment, the demon Ryuunosuke let out a loud, booming cackle of a laugh. It was not a carefree happy laugh. The sound gave me goose bumps. He laughed long and loud clutching his stomach as if in pain. Then as abruptly as it had started, the laughter stop. Within a moment he was in front of me, startling me. A clawed hand grasped a strand of my waved red hair, pulling on the ornament delicately embellishing it. I fought the urge to shudder.

"What is your name, girl?" Ryuunosuke asked, his breath hot on my face, the metallic scent of blood underlying the stale scent. I breathed slowly through my nose.

"Amu. My name is Amu." I replied without any respect, still trying to seem intimidating while pulling away slowly from the demon. He dropped my hair, glaring coldly.

"So you're a fighter. A fighter with a bit of a temper and bad manners." He grinned, smugly and I fought back a gag. "I shall have you, Amu, as my mate. But not yet. I shall play with you first. I think you'll make a most interesting toy." He laughed once more, and I stood taken aback, he grabbed my waist forcefully and we were flying.

"HAHAHAHAHA!" The cackling laugh echoed throughout the chambers of Ryuunosuke's cave-like palace. I stood in the middle of a large circular, empty room. Ryuunosuke sat comfortably in a plush chair on an end far from me, pretending to be a king. The floor and walls were complete stone.

Surrounding me were five lesser demons, obviously of draconian blood. They were larger than me by a few feet and took no hesitation in lunging towards me, attacking. I worked hard to dodge, not caring about exposure that the rags of clothing Ryuunosuke had put me in would allow. When a chance opened, I would kick or punch one of the draconian thugs, dodging back out. Of course, once I'd escape the thugs, almost winning the battle, a large burst of fire would be hurtled towards me from Ryuunosuke.

This was not the first fight I'd been forced into. For the two weeks in which I'd been here, the mornings had been reserved for fighting. I would be woken before the dawn, washed down harshly by servants of whose gender I could not tell, before being clothed in burnt rags of clothing and sent to the circular stone room. At first, I'd only been put against one guard/thug. I'd managed to overcome the one draconian four times before Ryuunosuke had gotten bored and his fire breath was upon me. Those were the first burns of many and the first broken bone.

After that first morning, Ryuunosuke would purposefully make the fights harder, adding obstacles and guards, finding any way to make me lose. And after hours of fighting, I always lost. I was sure I'd broken both of my wrists at least once during my stay here, along with my right arm. There may have been a shoulder dislocation or two as well, but Ryuunosuke was careful never to damage my legs. There would be trips or sprains, but never anything that would keep me from the next days fight.

The room I'd been given was no better than a cage, with no windows and locked doors. The bed was only furs thrown on the floor with a few pillows. Sometime after I'd fought, I was allowed to resign to my cage and quietly rest, the only way I could ignore the pain. Then, at what time I thought may have been lunchtime, I'd be brought a meal of bread cheese and some disgusting slime of a liquid. As the days went on, I realized the liquid must have been some kind of healing mixture. My wounds and cuts were healing far to fast to be on their own, especially considering just how many wounds I had.

This was not, by any means, a form of kindness from Ryuunosuke. It was not only to have me ready for the torture of the morning, but for the events in the evening. At the time I supposed was night I would be brought to the dining hall. Servants would cloth me in elaborate clothing, though always revealing, and patch up my unsightly wounds, making me pretty to foolish eyes. And as I watched Ryuunosuke dine on a feast, I sang.  
The words I sang were draconian. The first time I'd been forced to sing, Ryuunosuke had been displeased. Not with my voice, but of the song. He disliked the sound of my home language, or so he said. From then onwards, Ryuunosuke would have servants sing songs to me in draconian, an ugly language. I would sing the song as best I could, letting the memory of the words inflections lead me. But when a word was mispronounced, or if Ryuunosuke was displeased with anything else, the hot whip would sting me followed by the proper annunciation.

Some nights I would sleep in peace. Others the Dragon demon would come, bringing with him rough touches and misplaced affections that would haunt me, always ending in a beating. Ryuunosuke would not mate me yet, for reasons I knew not, but other touches were not forbidden in his mind. My purity was kept but such visits would always end in pain. A slap or perhaps a burn, because there was one thing I would not allow Ryuunosuke to take from me.

The disgusting demon never touched my lips. It was something I couldn't allow him to do. Kissing was something you did with a person you loved, a thought that was ingrained in me. It was one of the only things my mother had ever impressed so hardly upon me. That kissing and the like was reserved for love. Even though I was full of hatred for her and my entire family, I could not seem to let this feeling go. Maybe it was because I knew my mother was right, or maybe, and this was more likely, I didn't want to give Ryuunosuke the satisfaction of having my first kiss. I didn't want him to believe he could make me do anything. That he could have everything. Even if it meant ending with pain.

Today was one of the mornings after I'd refused him. The fight had been made nearly impossible, and I was failing. The burning smell of hair and skin was heavy in the air. One of the thugs stepped hard on my ankle and I stuck my arm roughly in my mouth to muffle my screaming. The pain turned my vision white and I could feel myself slipping. Suddenly all the pain, all the injuries and broken bones, re-surfaced and surrounded me. I swayed, falling back on my arms as I heard the demon scream.

"Not the legs! Haven't I told you idiots!" It was not concern in his voice, more like disappointment. There was a movement and the familiar rush of wind before I was grabbed and Ryuunosuke had me in a rough hold. I was thrown onto my mats with a grunt from the demon.

"I'm disappointed in you, Amu. You could've handled five." He clicked his tongue

condescendingly and I spat dark red on his shoe. He growled, grabbing me by the hair.

"Are you looking for more punishment?"

"What more can you do? If you're intending for a song tonight, your hands would seem to be tied." I laughed heartlessly, groaning at the pounding in my head.

"There will be no songs tonight. I'm leaving in the morning for the next couple of days. You're not as fun anymore, Amu." Ryuunosuke's claw traced a light line on my cheek making me shiver in disgust. "But when I get back, the games will be over." My eyes widened in realization.

"No." I whispered, as he confirmed my fears.

"You will become my mate." The dragon demon replied, leaving me shaking.

I awoke to the sounds of draconian screaming and the smell of fire. I listened harder and made out a few of the words I'd learned from songs. 'Attack' and was that 'run'? I couldn't be sure. The language was still new to me. However, what could I do? Locked here in this dark cage. So I sat in front of the door, like a sitting duck.

The screams died down until I heard none at all, though the burning smell was still present. I had banged on the door a few times earlier, hoping that a servant may open it in panic and I could escape. Several times I heard footsteps, but no one stopped. I couldn't even kick down the door with this bum foot.

A sense of defeat came over me and in reclusion, I hobbled back to the furs. My arms wrapped securely around one leg, leaving the other splayed out for fear of hurting the ankle further. I could have cried, but it didn't seem right. I hadn't cried at all since I'd been handed over to him. To shed tears now just seemed like giving up. But regardless of tears, there was a good deal of sadness inside me. So, while I refused to cry, I didn't mind a few minutes to tend to my own sadness.

It was in this moment that the door fell down. I looked up, thinking that there was not much that could surprise me anymore. Foolish thinking.

The man standing in front of my door, as if he'd done nothing unusual, was certainly a demon, far more handsome than Ryuunosuke. It was easy enough to see that this demon was of a different class than Ryuunosuke, without even knowing his name. His outfit was plain enough, white hakama and kimono, with red hexagonal embellishments. A simple breastplate with a tied yellow and blue sash, two swords tucked within it. The outfit itself was nothing like the extravagant clothing Ryuunosuke wore, yet this demon seemed to make the clothes look fit for a king.

Hair the color of starlight fell straight and long past his hips, the low light of the walled torches enhancing the rich silver color. Golden eyes stared coldly back at me, the faintest hint of red above the lid. A blue, crescent moon was high and proud on his forehead with two magenta stripes on each cheek. His glare was emotionless and cold, colder than I though was possible to produce.

He said nothing, walking gracefully into the room, seemingly unconcerned with my presence. There was a slow movement of his eyes, not head, as he looked around the room for something. Apparently, what he wanted was not here. Finally I got annoyed.

"Is everyone in this palace dead?" I asked, surprisingly brave from someone stuck on the floor. He turned to me, as if looking at me was a tedious task.

"Yes." He stated coldly, as if it was obvious.

"And you're the one that killed them?" This time he only nodded, once and very curt. I sighed, gripping the wall casually to lift myself, while trying to be intimidating. I was sure I was failing.

"I should have known from all the screaming." A scent hit my nose and I gagged. "Or the smell. Blood. Ugh!" I groaned, a wave of dizziness coming over me.

The demon was simply glaring at me, like my presence disgusted him. Yet he made no move to leave. He didn't seem like one to simply waste time, but then again, everyone was already dead. Perhaps he needed a rest. That's when it hit me.

"Oh! Your going to kill me as well, right?" I said a little panicky, surprised it had taken me this long to figure out the inevitable. Of course he wasn't leaving. What was the point in demolishing an entire palace if you left one person alive. He was most likely contemplating how to kill me, this moment.

"Yes." He said plainly, once again cold. I sighed, forcing myself to stand and slipping into a fighting position. Damn that dragon-thing! And Ryuunosuke too! How the hell was I supposed to fight with a bum ankle.

"I'm allowed to fight back right?" I asked though it was more stated as i winced slightly, stepping wrongly on my right foot. "I'm much stronger than I look and- Ow! I can hold my own." I said through mutters of pain. Not my best speech, but I had a few distractions.

The demon seemed to find my opposition amusing. Not that he laughed, or smiled or anything of that kind. He simply raised an eyebrow before drawing a sword. Oh crap! I'd forgotten about the swords. _'Always thinking things through, aren't we Amu.'_ But I was already engaged. I was going to have to fight, regardless of being without a sword...or proper footing.

I closed my eyes for a moment, allowing myself to fall back into the fights I'd been forced into the past weeks. '_Dispel the pain. Let it go. There's nothing holding me back. I can move freely. I'm gonna kick this guys ass and be free.'_ My eyes opened, my gaze intent on the demon, all the surprise gone. I'd done this before. A fight was not a game. It was to be done seriously or you'd die. And that was how I fought.

The demon moved quickly and ,almost in boredom, lunged at me. I propelled with my right foot, lifting my left leg in order to flip past the blade. My foot just barely missed the demons head. Just as I'd landed, the sword was coming down towards my head. I wouldn't be able to dog this one, it was much to fast. In a last ditch effort, I raised my arm, attempting to take the force of the blow with my forearm. I could live without a hand, couldn't I? Swinging my right leg, I worked to finally make contact with the demons body, knowing I wouldn't last much longer. Better to go down fighting, I'd suppose. But in the next second, I was caught completely off guard.

The sword that I'd expected to make contact with my arm stopped, inches away. My foot, which I'd expected to make contact with a body, was grabbed instead. There was a sharp pain in the ankle as it was squeezed in a powerful grip, the injury from earlier being agitated. The demon looked at me, glaring coldly but smug, knowing that he'd won.

There was a small 'swish' as the sword tore a rip in the sleeve of the dirty kimono I wore.

"I'm gonna die." I whispered, almost asking for his resolve as I once again felt just how much pain I was in. The foot that was not being held swayed, threatening to crumble beneath me. The demon dropped my foot almost in disgust and I immediately fell to the ground, screaming when my foot came into contact with the rock floor.

"Can you walk?" The words were not caring or any other emotion. It was only a question, an observation.

"No." I admitted, not even trying to cover. This was the ultimate defeat. Having to sit and wait for my head to be chopped off. Humiliating.

For a moment, the demon gave me a critical look, as if examining just how badly injured I was. Then he made a noise, something I found similar to a sigh, before he'd grabbed my wrist. There was the feeling of moving very quickly. Then the forceful feeling as if my entire body was being crushed between two rocks. And then nothing.

I fell onto grass gasping for air, my body in more pain then I ever thought possible. It took me few moments to realize that I was outside. I was sitting in grass. I was breathing fresh air. I could see the moon. It felt wonderful, but how had I gotten here.

Dizzily, my eyes caught sight of the demon from before, looming over me as if he was waiting for something. And I really was dizzy. The whole world seemed to be spinning along with me and my pain.

"Where are....Who.." I muttered, before slipping completely into unconsciousness.

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**Author's Note: Well there it is guy's! Tell me if it sucked. Again, pics of Amu are up on my DeviantArt account mentioned at the top.**

**P.S: Nice readers review. Even a simple little 'Nice' is cool! The more reviews, the more motivation.  
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	2. Chapter 2: New Choices

**Alright, I know this took FOREVER to update, but story writing has been extremely hard recently. It's a big debocal but I promise, even if updates take a little while, my storeis have not been forgotten.**

**I hope you all enjoy!

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**Chapter 2: New choices**

"Master Jaken , Look! I think she's waking up." A young girls voice drifted into my ears, the sound seeming faraway.

"Why would I care about a worthless human? Why our Lord has brought her here, I know not!" A higher pitched, squeakier voice complained. The tone pierced through my ears, forcing me to open my eyes and shut the source up.

"See! She's opening her eyes!" The young girl exclaimed as I attempted to focus my blurred vision. "Are you alright, Miss?" There was a human girl in front of me, no older than twelve, with large brown eyes. She smiled kindly at me, with the huge grin only a child could produce.

"Rin! Come here this instance! Let the human be!" There it was. That squeak of a voice. A small green hand wrapped quickly around the girls arm pulling her back. I watched the girl hesitate as the Toad demon assaulted her. Like in training, I thrust my body into a standing position, a fighting stance.

"Demon, let the girl-OW!" A wave of pain ran throughout my body, and I immediately crumbled to the ground.

"Oh no! Moving was a bad idea, Miss." The girl came towards me quickly, attempting to ease me into a more comfortable position against a tree.

"Stupid girl. Moving with injuries like yours will surely be painful." The toad commented, annoyed.

"Ngh." I mumbled. It felt as if there were a rock in my stomach, attempting to force its way out. Sweeping the area with my eyes, and herb caught me. "Girl!" I called quickly to the human beside me.

"This one is called Rin." She replied, cheerily.

"Rin, bring me the... stem of that yellow...plant there." The words were heavy out my mouth, marred by the pain, as I pointed to the Yellow flower on the outskirts of the clearing.

"Yes, that one." I exclaimed as the girl neared the plant. "Grasp the base hard and pull, but be careful of the flower. It pricks." The girl nodded, placing her hands lightly as I'd directed before pulling.

"Here." The yellow flower lay outstretched in the girls palms. Reaching for the stem, I took it, holding it far from my body. A rock lay next to me. It would have to do. Roughly, I struck the rocks edge against the flower, skinning off the prickly petals. Now I was left with the stem.

"Ugh. Here goes nothing." Chomping down, I finished the stem in three bites.I knew what the herb would do, but it was still unpleasent. The plant started of bitter rapidly changing to spicy and then an unbearable sensation. I felt my stomach lurch as I turned over and hurled.

"Mater Jaken, she's sick!" Rin yelled, panicking. The plants affects wore off, leaving me with a rotten taste in my mouth and a greenish ball of excrement. It was obviously not the usual vomit.

"What in the hell..." I exclaimed, wiping a hand across my mouth. There was a small clatter as the toad came behind me.

"Eeeew! Good god girl! Why on earth would you ingest so much Zycanthium?!" Jakens' voice squeaked as he peered over my shoulder at the green ball.

"Zya what?" The name was foreign to me.

"Zycanthium, you stupid woman! That is not a plant that a demon-let alone a human- should eat more than a leaf of, yet you seem to have ingested several stalks. Pathetic!" The toad rose his chin as he insulted me, and I did not hesitate in grabbing a skinny leg of his and swinging it out from beneath him.

"Who's a stupid human?" I growled. Rin was giggling as the toad stood, cursing as he brushed off his dark robes.

My stomach still ached from the Zycanthium, and it was not hard to guess how I'd come to have the plant in my body. It fit Ryunnosuke's style all too perfectly; feeding me some kind of lethal substance.

"Tell me demon, what is this Zycanthium?" I doubted the toad would answer, but it seemed the demon was more proud of his knowledge than I'd thought.

"The plant Zycanthium hardens muscles and organs. It is often taken by demons before battle, but only in small portions and mixed with other diluting things. Of course, even a small portion given to a human would cause great abnormalities. And you seem to have ingested loads of it raw! Why, I would not be surprised if you've no muscles left at all!" He formed a cackle of a laugh at the end of his explanation, and my fist tightened with the urge to punch him. Sadly, he was out of reach.

"So, this plant could be used to heal muscles?"

"If you were looking to die, yes!" The toad laughed again. "But a demon would never use Zycanthium as a healing drink, lest he end up like you." I glared hard at the toad, loathing my diminishing position. Were I less broken, he wouldn't stand a chance.

"The berries are such a pretty blue, but they will do you no good! Lord Sesshomaru told me never to touch that plant, so I don't." The girls expression was absolute, her Lord's word was obviously law in her was I even here in the first place? With a girl and a demon.

But more importantly, I was outside. The pain had distracted me earlier, I supposed it was a dream. But I really was outside, free from Ryuunosuke!

Memories of the night before were unclear. I remember the attack on Ryuunosuke's palace. I'd been abandoned in the fire....there was a fire, right? But I fought someone...the attacker. And I lost...with my injuries I had to have lost...But right about there it all went fuzzy.

"This Sesshomaru...is he the one who brought me here?"I asked, my voice hesitant.

"How dare you address my lord without his title!" The toad screamed. Obviously, I'd hit a nerve.

"Yes, Miss. Isn't my lord kind?"

"I suppose...." Her lord. Rin seemed to be a normal child. Yet she traveled with demons. This Sesshomaru...could he possibly be the one I'd fought? His eyes had been so cold... A demon such as he could never travel with such a sweet child, could he?

"Rin, where is this Lord? I'd like to thank him."

"Lord Sesshomaru is not here, Miss." The girl answered politely.

"Oh? Where is he?"

"What makes you think you have the right to inquire about our Lords whereabouts?!" The toad exploded again. "A rude woman who does not even give her name to her saviors does not deserve to be in the presence of the esteemed Lord Sesshomaru!"

"I don't remember a toad saving me from anything or anyone!" I yelled back at the snooty toad. "You haven't shown me any respect, so I see no reason why I should respect you."

"Why you ungrateful wretch!" The toad screamed. "If you were-"

"If I were an 'ungrateful wretch', which I harshly disagree with, It would be Miss Rin who I am neglecting. Not a pompous toad!"

"Rin?!" The toad exclaimed, confused. Ignoring him, I turned to the girl.

"Rin, I am very sorry for not thanking you earlier for taking care of me. My name is Amu." Graciously, I extended a hand out to the girl. I would have preferred a hug, but my position was compromising. She shook it eagerly.

"That is fine, Miss Amu! But it is my lord you should thank. He is the one who told Master Jaken and I to make you healthy again." Goodness! Was her lord all this girl thought about? Still, there was an air of innocence that made being angry at the child difficult.

"Well...then it looks as if I'll be staying here for a while." Lightly I reclined my arms behind my head. They seemed to hurt the least out of my entire body, and trees are not good pillows.

"WHAT?!" The toad erupted yet again.

"Are you perpetually screaming, toad? Or do you ears simply not work?" Rin giggled at this. "I said I'll be staying here for a while."

"What makes you believe that-"

"I'm staying until I can properly say thanks! That's my decision, and you can bet it's not swaying." In affirmation, I pressed my lips tightly together. And I would've kept them that way had the toad not looked as if he would explode.

"What is your problem?" I yelled angrily, but the toad simply walked off, muttering something about 'unwanted human'.

I sighed. If this Lord Sesshomaru really was the demon who'd attacked me last night, thanks wasn't really anything I felt like offering him. In any normal situation, I would thank his companions for taking care of me and leave. But in all honesty....I was too curious as to who this Lord was. Because if it was indeed last nights demon, his actions did not make sense. Saving someone whom you're going to kill? Not very logical. The demon did not seem particularly merciful either.

But what interesting company this demon did keep. A lowly toad demon, with an overly obnoxious attitude, and a young human girl. It may not be horribly bad to stay put here. It did not look like the toad could hurt me, though I'm sure he would grate on my nerves. The girl was more than pleasant and they'd found a rather discrete clearing for a campground. Yes, this would do nicely. Besides, it was not as if I had anywhere else to go.

That thought stung more than I'd thought it would. Yes, I would never be welcomed back at the village. Not after I'd left Ryuunosuke. Id failed my mission. Besides, I was unwanted. They'd thrown me to the monster to be eaten. Being alive now, though barely, was a miracle.

"_Who is the new one?"_ I jumped slightly at the words. _Draconian? _

"Who's there?" I asked, looking around as much as I could from my lying position.

"What's wrong, Miss Amu?" Rin called to me. She'd been picking some flowers residing on the outskirts of our campsite.

"_She calls herself Amu."_ There it was again!

"Rin....Didn't you hear that just now?"

"What are you talking about, Miss Amu? Jaken is yelling rather loudly, but he's a ways off. He'll definitely come back though-"

"No that's not it!" I yelled, possibly too forcefully. The girl recoiled and I sighed, softening my tone. "Ignore it Rin. Perhaps I hit my head a little to hard." The girl frowned but continued flower picking.

_"The human yelled at Rin."_

_ "Un-tolerable, that is."_

"Gaah!" I yelled, the noises angering me. It was definitely Draconian, but where was it coming from? Slowly, I put my weight against the tree, pushing myself up enough so I was in a standing position. Scanning the trees quickly, my eyes found the source. There was a two headed dragon on the outskirts of the clearing, an area that had been just out of my view before. The dragon's were speaking to each other, displeased at my treatment of the young girl.

I moved forward slowly, curiosity driving me towards the dragon. The creature seemed smart enough. And dragons meant fire, right? Perhaps this beast would be able to explain the events of the previous night to me.

_"Dragon." _I called, referring back to my limited vocabulary. Understanding the language was one thing, but speaking it was another. The fact that my muscles were throbbing from movement didn't exactly help, either.

_"The human speaks to us." _One said.

_"She knows the language." _The other replied.

_"Please, I confused. What happened at night? The attack is what I don't know." _I knew my sentence must be shaky, but it was the best I could do. I hoped the beast would understand. I swayed slightly more, still far from the dragon. Damn that, Ryuunosuke.

_"She speaks worse than a child. Can you understand her?"_

_ "She asks us of the attack, brother. The raid of fire." _ The two dragons grunted in understanding to each other and I leaped at the understanding, moving forward quickly to let them know they were correct.

_"Yes. Happened at night? What was-" _I was cut short, my leg giving out quickly from me. My ankle must have twisted and I screeched in pain, expecting to meet the ground quickly. But rather than dirt and twigs, my cheek met silk.

I was still slipping, only half aware of the claws just barely touching my arm, holding me up. Desperately, I clung onto the kimono, doing my best not to fall to the ground as I attempted to steady myself. Only then did I notice the growl as the claw released it's hold on my arm.

"Ah!" I exclaimed as I fell, landing on my bottom. "Ouch. What was that for?" I yelled, looking up accusingly at whoever had caught me only to let me fall. Not for the first time in my life, I wished for the ability to retract my words.

It was the same demon from my nightmares and the one who I was fairly positive had fought me the night before. Cold eyes glared down at me, wiping the area of his kimono on which I'd clung with his claw in disgust.

"Uh....sorry." The words escaped before I even though about it. It was almost an automatic reflex, considering the glare he was giving me and my new resolve to live.

"Jaken." The demon called, voice unnaturally devoid of emotion.

"Oh my lord! You've returned to us. How happy I am that you're alive and well. You've no idea how we've suffered here. Why this human has-" The demon's rant was cut short as he noticed the glare he was receiving from his 'lord'.

"Jaken, were my instructions not clear?" The toad tensed immediately, and I almost felt sorry for him.

"Why of course they were, my Lord."

"Then why have they been ignored?" The question was cold, underlying murderous intent.

"What do you mean, my grace? We did take care of the human as you instructed-!" The toad was cut off.

"Are you saying I lie, Jaken?" The expression on Sesshomaru's face was disturbing. Maybe not his expression, but the overwhelming dark aura surrounding him.

"N-no, my lord." The toad whimpered.

"Lord Sesshomaru, you're back!" Rin exclaimed running up to her lord, a handful of flowers gathered in her palms.

"Yes." Sesshomaru replied curtly, though the girl simply smiled broadly at him.

"Look at the flowers I found here! Aren't they pretty?" Quickly she lifted her palms out, extending the small flower buds up for his inspection. He simple nodded before walking off again. _Was he going to leave again?_

"Wait!" I called, attempting to stand once more. He stopped, turning back to face me with annoyance. "Why did you bring me here?"

The clearing went silent at the question. One we had all been wondering, that I had been stupid enough to ask so bluntly. Eyes were expressionless as he began to speak.

"I've no obligation to explain my action to a human such as yourself." He replied coolly. Fire flared within me.

"You certainly do! This concerns me as much as it does you! I've heard the rumors of you. Cold and heartless. So why then would you keep two humans? Are we your food?" I yelled angrily. My head pounded and I couldn't take any aversion. If this demon planned to have me for a meal, his dreams would be crushed. I would not escape death only to be endangered once more.

"Someone as weak as you is not nearly worthy enough to be my meal." He growled, stepping menacingly closer. "However, I will not hesitate to kill you if you do not learn to keep that impertinent mouth of yours silent."

"What gives you the right to order me around! I'm not some item in your possession!" I grit my teeth, standing quickly to face the demon, poised defensively.

"I've told you to be silent." His cool tone only made me angrier.

"I don't have to listen to you!" In rage, I whipped my foot around, willing all my strength into the kick. My foot was caught in an instant and I was hurled effortlessly onto the ground.

"Foolish girl! You should know you're no match for Lord Sesshomaru!" The toad taunted from the side. I spat in his direction. "Why you disgusting, human!"

"You are here to accompany Rin as a female companion. Fail her in any way, and I will not hesitate to kill you." He looked down at me, meeting my glare with his cold eyes. "Insolence will not be tolerated."

"Do I have a choice in this?" I asked, shifting so that my back rested against a near tree.

"I will not waste energy forcing you." He stated simply, turning and moving to the dragon. I did not bother speaking any more.

"Miss Amu..." Rin asked, voice tentative.

"Yes?" I replied slowly, not wishing to take my frustration out on the girl.

"Do you think, maybe you'll stay? I..I'd really like it." Her eyes were wide and innocent.

"I'm not sure, Rin.." I was hesitant to give any form of reply.

"Right." The girl said, smiling sadly. "Miss Amu probably has a family she wants to go back too."

_Family. _The word resonated in my head. How long had it been since I'd left my village. The days had blended together. A week. A month. I was unsure. And how was I to know. Regardless, no one in my village missed me. They all most likely rejoiced in my death. So what other choice did I have, other than to travel alone. I wouldn't last long the way I was now. Hell, I didn't even know where I was.

Sesshomaru didn't have to force me. There was no other choice.

"No Rin. I don't have a family." I murmured, before smiling. "You sure you want to travel with me?"

"Yes!" Rin exclaimed, throwing her arms around my waist.

"Ah!" My ribs groaned from the pressure. "Rin...please..." I groaned.

"Ooops!" Her arms loosened, as she looked up to smile at me. "I'm just happy you'll be with us, Miss Amu! It's no fun being the only girl."

"But...you barely know me." I breathed as Rin stood up and grinned.

"I can tell that we'll be good friends though. I can feel it." Her smile widened and I returned the motion.

"I hope we do, Rin."

"Pff." I turned my head sharply to see the toads rude expression.

"You wanna say something, toad." I spat. The toad seemed to jump at the oppurtunity.

"I do! You should not be here! It was on the good graces of my Lord that you~!"

As Jaken continued talking I felt a tug on my shirt. Rin extended her hands with the flowers she'd shown Sesshomaru earlier.

"Are these for me?" I asked, quieter than normal.

"Yes." She replied, whispering. "It's a thanks for staying."

"Thank you for the gift then." I gigled slightly, grinning down at her.

"...and- hey!Are you listening?" Jaken yelled, overexcited over nothing.

"Nope." I replied, Rin laughing behind me.

"WHY YOU LITTLE-" Jaken's screaming was cut short as a rock collided with his forehead. I turned to see the Lord standing calmly by the dragon, as If nothing had happened. I chuckled.

"So he does have a sense of humor."

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**Author's note: That's it for now. I hope you all enjoyed it. Anything you want to see in the future chapters, feel free to let me know! :0**


	3. Chapter 3: Kindness and Undersanding

**Author's Note:**You all surely do not want to hear my excuses as to why this is so late. Good news? I'm already writing Chapter 4. The story is planned.

**Even better news!**My illness that had been affecting me cognitively where writing is concerned has cleared up considerably. While I won't promise I'll update within weeks, my goal is to update sooner than a month. We'll see. Hopefully, there are some of you left still reading and supporting this story.

Also, to those who may have noticed the rating change on this story, I assure you this will not become a smutty, lemon filled fic. The M rating stands simply because of how I have the story planned and for events occurring _**way**_in the future. If, and only _if_I decide to include a particularly graphic chapter I'll place a big old **WARNING.**So be relieved.

**Enjoy!**

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**Chapter 3: Kindness and Understanding **

The first few weeks of traveling had been rough. It did not take me long to learn that Sesshomaru did not dote on weakness of any kind. Though... the lord didn't really dote on anything.

We moved quickly, never resting in one place for more than a fore-night, and stopping only once a day to eat. The only days we could rest were the days in which the Lord was absent, away for his own personal business matters. Matters, of course, non of us were ever informed of. I'd heard muttered mentions of an '_Inuyasha'_ and another named _'Tessaiga'_; Most recently _'Naraku'_. But none of these names were ever explained. And I'd become so focused on _not _being killed, I never really pushed.

The demon seemed to flit in and out of camp as he pleased, not seeming to care if he was in our presence or not. Yet he was always among our camp in the morning, and he'd bring us some sort of meal at night. He was the strangest caretaker I'd ever met, and an even stranger lord.

The first day we traveled had been the hardest. After my little spat with Sesshomaru, he had turned to leave. And without a word of direction, the toad and girl had begun packing their things. It confused me.

"What's going on?"

"We're leaving, Miss Amu." Rin explained easily, taking my hand. She attempted to lift me to my feet and lead me onwards. I shook my head.

"Quickly, woman! Our Lord does not wait!" Jaken squealed, standing beside the dragon, faced staff in hand. I glowered.

"Heaven's forbid." I grumbled, grasping the trunk of the tree to lift myself. My new 'Lord' was already miles ahead of us, the toad running to catch him. Rin's eyes looked anxiously from her lord to me, clearly wishing to follow.

"Go on Rin. I'll be there shortly." I motioned her off with my head, not confident enough yet to wave my hand. She looked at me worriedly for a moment before turning slowly and walking towards the dragon.

To be honest, I wasn't exactly sure what I was doing. How was I to walk anywhere in this condition? I mean, I prided myself on having a high pain tolerance, especially for a woman. But the state my tampered body was in...well it was just unrealistic to assume I could move fluidly anywhere. Hell, I could barely push myself off of the tree. _Pathetic. _

My feet moved slowly in front of me, knee's wobbling like a child learning to walk. My stomach lurched the longer I stayed standing and I could feel myself spin. It was like being drunk, without any of the perks.

As I was feeling myself sway out of control, a small hand grasped mine.

"I'll help you to Ah-Un, Miss Amu." Rin said in her innocent voice.

I laughed slightly, giving her a gentle nod. "Thank you, Rin-Chan."

Though I didn't expect the girl to be able to help me much, she was surprisingly stable. She lead me easily over to the demon, jumping all around me as different parts of me swayed.

_"Making Rin help her."_

_ "Useless human."_

The dragons eyes followed me as I saddled onto their back, though I couldn't tell whether they were annoyed...or angry.

Since then, I'd been forced to ride Ah-Un; and in turn, forced to listen to their Draconian all day. The language put me on edge and I found it hard to relax hearing them chastise me. And while I had to give the dragon credit for walking with what I assumed was more care, every little movement really did cause pain. Without the virulent herb increasing healing, my body had become substantially weaker. No...it was worse than that.

Slight strains caused wounds to re-open, and simple cuts wouldn't stop bleeding. The toad said it was the Zycanthium tampering with my bodies natural... something or other, which made healing harder. With each drop of blood my hatred for that bastard Ryuunosuke grew. For the longest time, I hadn't dared even to breathe his name, reciting the curse only in my mind. One of the silly curses Satsu and I had thought dangerous and forbidden as children.

Though one morning, while we'd been riding into another village, my stomach wound reopened. The red seeped through my already withered yukata, staining the foul cloth deeply. The pain was no longer there, aside from the slight sting from air, but when I moved to touch the area, checking the wetness, the entire area ripped. Wind nipped at the wound as dirt from my hands dug into the opening. I cussed before thinking.

"Damn him! **Damn** that Ryuunosuke!" I'd yelled, ripping my hand away. I held no attachments to the yukata at all, its dirt and short style reminding me only of pain. But I had no money to buy replacements. "To the seven depths of HELL with that demon!"

In an instance, the world quieted, my scream echoing throughout the town.I felt millions of eyes focus on me, as shocked as I was at my outburst. My eyes swept the village, buying time with avoidance while looking to the obviously scared residents.

_Damn. That...was supposed to be in my head._

Slowly. Carefully, I looked back, meeting the golden gaze that could kill.

"Ah..." I flinched unconsciously at his glare. "M-my apologies..." Gritting my teeth I committed to a small bow, fighting against the humiliation almost more than the pain.

It was bad of me to bring more attention to us. Two human women traveling amongst demons was already a source of gossip, without adding a foul mouth. I could tell from the whispers.

_"Look at her. What is she, a demon's whore?"_

_"I wouldn't mind being his whore."_

_"Poor thing. He must beat her."_

_"She probably brought it upon herself."_

Yes, these people surely noticed us. I chanced a glance back at my party. Rin was giggling, very quietly as she covered her mouth. Jaken sat flabbergasted, the insults he was eager to yell already forming on his lips. I dared not look at Sesshomaru.

_"Makes a fool of him, the strange girl." _One of the dragons said.

_"Foolish thing, can't appreciate what she's been given." _The other replied in a cackle.

_"Gifts? I given nothing!" _I hissed back, fed up with their taunting. I was certainly not in the mood for it. But Ah-Un only laughed at my speech impediment.  
"Like I'd waste time learning a language as ugly as yours." I mumbled the words, knowing they could hear. In response, the dragons shifted one of their shoulder blades sending me jolting forward, my wound scrapping against their scaled neck.

_"Stupid thing. Taunting like a child. Such large pride for one with so little."_

_ "A child who has accomplished nothing. She does not deserve what she'll receive."_

As I scrambled back onto the dragon, I felt slightly ashamed. I was angry and these creatures were capricious, but they weren't wrong. This childish squabble should have been below me...

"Here." The lord ordered, his tone icier than ever as he halted. _Angry. He was certainly angry. _Rin gave a delighted inhale, as she caught site of the building we stood in front of. Why, I was unsure.

The building was not lavish, and there was no sign outside to tell me whether it was a simple home or an actual business. As I watched Rin jump from behind me off Ah-Un, scurrying excitedly to the door, I couldn't imagine the structure housed any danger.

Then again...Rin's judgment on danger was questionable, considering her chosen companions.

"Come, human." Lord Sesshomaru directed, not bothering to stop for me as he walked to the building entrance. He knocked twice and the door opened, the wooden object hiding the door's opener and the lord from my view.

"Well? What are you waiting for girl!" Jaken yelped from behind me. "Follow my Lord!" I glared back at the toad but knowing he was right, I slowly eased off the dragon. My stomach burned with each movement and I slung a hand over my midriff to cover the exposing rags.

"Human." Sesshomaru called from inside, tone curt and impatient.

_This must be my punishment. _I thought, speeding my crawl to an almost jog as I reached the door. Sesshomaru looked down at me for a moment, eyes disapproving before nodding me forward. I turned, facing the elder woman who stood by the open door.

Her face was wrinkled, so harshly I could barely make out the details of her face. Long grey hair was piled in a bun on the back of her head. The colored kimono she wore reached the floor, her petite body drowning in the fabric.

"Oh...Rin you...you have grown." She muttered, her hands reaching forward slightly to touch my face, staring blankly at me.

_She's blind? _"My name is Amu, Ms..." I looked down curiously as the woman nodded, her hands leaving my face as she turned into her home.

"My name is old and pointless. Just call me Jii-chan." She turned back to me, grinning for a moment before leading Sesshomaru and I into her home. _Jii-chan...like Grandpa?_

"This woman needs a new Kimono then, my Lord?" She said, motioning towards a pair of couches where Rin already sat before disappearing into a back room.

"Something like that, yes." He sat back against the seat, more relaxed than I was used to seeing him normally. "Movable."

"Moveable...moveable..." She muttered, returning empty handed, much to my surprise. "Where's the girl?" She asked, searching aimlessly for a moment before making a sound of approval. "Ah, stand stand." She ordered, though I was only just beginning to sit.

Her eyes seemed to roam over my body as I stood straight. Occasionally she'd pinch a thigh or wrap a hand around my waist. Taking out a measuring tape, she measured the thickness of my hips and waist. "Ahh...Good child bearing hips." She muttered, and I flushed. She seemed to throw a knowing look to the lord which he met with clear, indifferent disgust.

"Chesty too." She chuckled. "Kimono would be tough..." She muttered to herself, looking me over before nodding and disappearing once more. She left and I turned to Sesshomaru and Rin, confusion plastered on my face.

"What's going on?" I whispered. Sesshomaru frowned, just slightly at the question.

"Are you that dull?" His cold stare almost made me feel as such. Rin gave me a small smile.

"Lord Sesshomaru, will I be getting a new Kimono as well?" The young girl asked, cluing me into the visit in her own 'clever' way. The lord gave me a look that practically screamed "_A child can understand what you can't."_

" I knew we were here for clothing. I meant why are-"

"I've got it!" Jii chan had re-entered the room excitedly and I turned away from my companions to face her, a turquoise silk in her arms. With a swift tug she untied the obi around my teared kimono, the flaps falling to the side to expose my bareness underneath.

"J-Jii chan!" I yelped, my eyes widening as I tried to pull the flimsy material over myself. _Just because you can't see doesn't mean the others can't. _But the old woman paid no mind, motioning with her hand quickly. Rin stood, scurrying quickly to pull a folding screen open behind me, and I sighed in relief.

"What are you, a child. No need to be so prudent." She muttered, her hands shaking slightly with age as she tossed my Kimono aside. Quicker than I'd have thought she could move, she'd fastened a nearly see through white Haori to me, the fabric barely covering my thighs. She tied a flat sash around it quickly before unfurling the dazzling blue silk from its neat bundled state in her arms.

"Oh wow..." I muttered, staring appreciatively towards the fabric. Jii-chan smiled slightly, slipping the fabric over my back and through my arms. It turned out to be some kind of Kosode, the silk fabric brushing against the middle of my thighs softly. Red flowers blossomed on the bottoms and sleeves, complimented by weaving black vines. The obi around my middle was a simple black, rimmed in dark red. It was simple yet dazzling all together, and I admired myself in the mirror.

"It would look much better were you cleaner." Jii-chan whispered, standing next to me, so short the top of her head barely reached my chest. I must have smelled more foul than I'd thought. "Rin, close the screen child. Let your Lord see."

Rin did as she was told, squealing excitedly once she saw me. I smiled at her through the mirror while Sesshomaru stood. His eyes looked me over once before nodding. _He was going to let me keep this!_

"Too bright." He stated simply. "This won't do. A simple human needs a simpler kimono. Less flashy and more suited to a servant."

Jii-chan seemed surprised, her eyebrows lifting enough her eyes were better visible. After a short moment though, she nodded, tugging me towards a back room with more fabric. "A shame. The blue would have complimented your hair so wonderfully. The way it glitters that red in the light is charming."

I pursed my lips a little, grabbing a strand of my short hair. The ruddy brown color curled around my finger. This hair, a ruddy, ugly color mixed between brown and red ... My mind wandered back to my time in the village, to my mother who had always been concerned with the scarlet in my hair. It was so like her own and yet unlike all the others around me. The potions she'd bargain for with the medicine woman, ones that turned my hair dark like the others. The ink she'd poured onto my roots. I'd wondered since childhood on why she'd never bothered so with her own.

And just as quickly as my thoughts had wandered they came back, delayed in realizing something else. "Wait...what do you mean it compliments my hair?" I asked, tactlessly. "Aren't you..."

Jii-chan laughed. "The mind assumes what it want's to, child," She smirked, her eye glinting at me through wrinkled slits, "But assuming does not always match up to the truth."

Embarrassment kept me silent as Jii-chan stripped the Kimono off of me, folding it once more and placing it to the side. She told me to sit on the tatami while she left, and I did as told, watching her return with both Rin and our Lord.

"You treat these women poorly, Lord Sesshomaru." She criticized, tugging Rin to her. "I'll do as you expect, but browse the options I've laid out please." Her wrinkled hands gestured towards another room. Sesshomaru nodded before walking in gracefully and quickly.

Rin and I were lead swiftly out of the showing room, through a small courtyard between the house to a hot spring in the yard. The entire area was gated, but the baths steamed with heat, looking picturesque and serene. I hadn't expected the property to be so spacious. Rin bounced beside me in excitement, obviously knowing what was coming.

"Take off your clothes, children." Jii-chan followed behind us, bottles, soap and a cloth in a wooden basket slung over her arm.

We did as told, Rin immediately jumping into the bathing spring when she finished. I was about to reprimand her disrespect, but Jii-chan laughed. She teetered towards the side of the bath. "You'll freeze sitting there, Amu."

Slowly I eased myself into the bath beside Rin. The water was almost too hot, tingling against my worn, dirty skin. And yet the sensation was wonderful, wiping away all that had pained me. The tingling merged to a sting as I emerged deeper, my wound burning with the water. My teeth ground together, not wanting to spoil Rins mood.

Slowly, I grew used to the pain, dunking my entire body under. No bath had ever felt so wonderful. I hadn't had the chance to truly wash since traveling with Sesshomaru, and Ryuunosuke had treated me worse. I relaxed against the stone of the tub, resting my arms on either side of my body, letting the steam surround me. I watched Jii-chan finish washing Rin to the side of me, the young girl not so dirty as I. Kimono sleeves rolled up, she moved to me.

"You seem finished, child." She said gently, her hands running a minty liquid through my hair. Her fingers moved deftly across my scalp, relaxing me instantly.

"Finished?" I whispered, eyes closed in ease.

"Worn down. A child your age should not be so damaged." The implications in her statement was clear. "You're far from home, aren't you."

I smiled. "What gave it away?" Her fingers traced over my shoulders, showing me the green stains now dirtying them.

"You were a warrior, weren't you my child." Jii-chan leaned over to show me her smile, toothy and knowing. "From Peiyan, correct?"

Jii-chans soothing manner had dulled my senses, the change in her attitude so relaxing, it took me a moment to remember. I'd forgotten about the marks, to be honest. It had been so long since I'd last seen them, and even longer since my mother had painted them onto my shoulders. I was surprised the henna had lasted so long.

"That was a long time ago, Jii-chan." I murmured, trying for the millionth time to asses just how long I'd been locked away in Ryuunosuke's dungeon.

"It could not have been too long. This dye does not last longer than 5 months."

"Long enough." I worried the old woman would begin pressing me for information, but the questions stopped there. Instead, she stayed silent, devoting herself to scrubbing away the dirt on my body. Jii-chans hands shook slightly with old age, yet the motion was comforting.

As Jii-chan washed away the months of filth, I fell into relaxation. Sleep settled over me as my mind drifted to lost memories and sweet dreams.

_Kind words whispered by a coarse voice, quaking with old age. Large, strong hands that lifted me up into the air. He held me high, swinging me in a circle while I laughed. Grandmother sits on a seat of gold, her hair surrounding her like starlight. I know she's my grandmother, but her face is strange, as aged as my mothers. _

_ He sets me on his lap, placing his hands lovingly on my cheeks. As my eyes meet his, it hurts. "Why does it hurt?" I ask, only to feel more pain. It stings. It burns..._

"Ah...you silly child." Jii-chans voice drifts back to my conscience as she wraps my hair in a towel. "Wake up. You'll faint sleeping here." Her hands move from my hair to my jaw, rubbing her fingers in a circular motion. "Release that tension and let Jii-chan take care of you."

She stands and walks away from me. I turn to follow her, noticing Rin laying on a blanket near the baths. A light robe covers her as she seems to be resting. A blanket is next to her, and Jii-chan pats it, telling me to lay here, face up.

"No robe for you either." She laughs as I stand, covering myself with my hands. _One of the moments where I wish my hair were longer. _"What do you have to hide. Such a youthful, perky body." She sighed, shaking her head as she covered my chest and lower region with soft cloths.

"When you're my age, you'll wish you'd run naked now. What I wouldn't give for such a pert body." Her laugh was almost a cackle, patting my cheek harshly as I blushed.

Once Jii-chan stopped laughing, her eyes scanned my body. I knew most of my wounds had healed over, some scarring, others fading to barely visible bruises. But Jii-chans eyes stopped on the stomach wound, the one I thought had re-opened today. Jii-chan was about to prove me wrong.

"You let something like this grow infected, my child." Her voice was quiet, genuine concern present as she dabbed at the opening with a cloth. I frowned, knowing a festering wound's normal fatalities. "The grime you were covered in really hid the severeness of it. It's practically oozing..."

She stood quickly, returning into her house of many rooms only to return with a needle and what seemed to be metallic thread, more bottles of calming colors.

"Just...what are you Jii-chan?" I asked, watching her thread the needle with what seemed to be wire. "A seamstress? A doctor? A maid?"

"At my age I'm whatever is useful." She replied, dipping a rag in alcohol before placing it in my mouth. I knew what she meant to do and bit down on the rag, preparing as she began to stitch the wound with care. To Jii-chans credit, the needle work was fast, and it stung much less then when I'd had Jun stitch my arm before. This would not scar, I knew already. When she finished, she covered the wound with a salve, wrapping it gently with cloth and helping me dress into my undergarments, and Haori.

"Thank you." I bent to press a kiss to Jii-chans cheek. "I feel much better." The old woman only smiled, shaking Rin's shoulder to wake her. As she helped

Rin to her feet, she turned to me.

"Come. Dress yourself."

The kosode Lord Sesshomaru had decided on was a dark maroon. There was no pattern or embellishments on this pattern, and the sleeves were cropped closer to the body, avoiding dragging fabric. The obi remained the same as earlier, and Jii-chan outfitted me with socks that covered my shins and plain shoes with hard soles.

Rin had left, wearing her new green, flower patterned kimono. She waited with the rest of our party by Ah-Un. I stayed behind, unwilling to leave this strange woman just yet. It had been so long since I'd felt the comfort she offered, it felt wrong to leave so abruptly. I stopped to hug her, smiling as she ruffled my short curls with rough hands.

"Here." She handed me a small pouch. "Rub that salve over your little battle scar every morning and night. It will keep it clean. There's extra bandage in there too."

I smiled, bowing to her before standing. "Thank you again, Jii-Chan."

"Stay safe." She almost whispered, before clearing her throat and giving my behind a quick slap. "Go. Your Lord has surely left by now. That demon waits for noone."

We made camp just a small ways out from the village, Sesshomaru parting ways the minute after he directed this was were we'd stay. Jaken had scampered off to find meat. I'd almost thought we'd stay at an inn while in town, but Rin corrected me, explaining that commoners would not house demons, and Sesshomaru would never pay to sleep somewhere.

"It's degrading for him." Rin whispered, spreading out her bedroll. "He doesn't like being around humans."

Her statement puzzled me. "That's right...So isn't it odd that he lets us travel with him?"

Rin looked up at the question, her face blank as if the statement made no sense to her. " It's not odd. He wants us here, Ms. Amu."

I nodded slowly, gathering more kindling to throw into the fire. The question had been bothering me for a while now, and I'd never found the chance to ask. The Lord barely seemed to tolerate me, and hated most other humans on principle. Why would he choose to keep a young girl in his presence.

"Rin...how is it you came to travel with Lord Sesshomaru?" I asked. Rin shifted her bedroll closer to the fire, tucking herself into a laying position atop the blankets.

"He saved me, Miss Amu! Just like he saved you." I looked at her curiously.

"Saved you from what? Demons."

The girl shook her head slowly. "From death, Miss Amu."

"I see..." I wondered what had tried to kill the girl, patting her hair absently." You were attacked then? By humans?" _That might explain his hatred of them..._But Rin only laughed a little, shaking her head.

"No Ms. Amu." Her smile faded slightly as she shrugged down onto the mat. "I _was_ dead." Rin said, as if it were nothing. I stared at the girl for a moment, seeing her in a new light.

"How...is that even possible?" I whispered, not expecting Rin to answer.

"Lord Sesshomaru brought me back from the underworld. His sword, it's special. And he used it for me." Rin smiled almost sadly, looking at her hands. "I was an orphan anyway, and the village was done with me. So.. Of course I would follow him after such an act. To repay him."

I raised a hand to stroke Rin's hair, searching the young girls face. She closed her eyes, weary and worn from the eventful day. I hummed quietly, wishing her to sleep quickly. "Do you have nightmares about it, Rin?" I asked gently, thinking of the suppressed nightmares I fought. Ones that luckily had let me be recently.

She nodded. "Sometimes. But not often." The young girl yawned, shifting onto her side. "It's better when he's here..." _Sesshomaru._

"I'm sure." I whispered, not completely agreeing.

"He keeps my dreams safe...and I keep him safe." Rin murmured, falling into sleep. I raised an eyebrow.

"How is that?"

She smiled lightly. "He's lonely...Miss Amu..."

I watched Rin's breaths come slowly, taking comfort in her sleeping face. Asking her more would have been unkind. Lonely wasn't the first word that came to mind when I thought of the demon lord. But perhaps there was more wisdom in the girls words than I'd thought.

As Jaken shuffled into camp, I pushed the thoughts aside, making quick work of cleaning the few wild rodents with which he'd returned with as dinner. When the toad moved to wake Rin, I advised against it.

"She'll eat tomorrow. Let her rest."

He grumbled but complied, and I was left to cook in peace. Just as the meat was finishing cooking, our Lord surprised us by returning. Jaken lept upwards, easily excited by the sight of his lord. As Sesshomaru brushed past him, motioning him to stop the toad squealed.

"My Lord, your arm! What's happened?" The toad asked, noticing what I had not. Attached to Sesshomaru's left arm was a dragon claw.

"A gift." He replied curtly, seating himself next to the fire.

"A gift? From who my lord?" The toad scurried to sit beside him. "Surely not."

"Jaken, silence or I'll kill you."

I watched the two warily, bringing the meat out of the fire on skewers. He was gifted with another arm...a dragon arm. The sight of it was all to familiar to me and I felt my stomach turn at the sight. Handing a skewer first to Sesshomaru then Jaken, I decided to leave well enough alone.

"Let's eat." I said quietly, biting into my kebab halfheartedly. My eyes followed the lords left arm as he held the kebab, not eating.

We fell into a silence. Sesshomaru seemed deep in thought, testing his new arm on menial things. Jaken was too scared to speak, watching his lord intently. I looked away. The new arm Sesshomaru had acquired did not fill me with anything but nausea.

Feeling a sting on my hand, I slapped hard, killing a mosquito. This seemed to catch both demon's attention, they're eyes facing mine. But no words.

"Someone _please_ say something..." I murmured, unable to contain myself anymore.

Rin had fallen asleep far too early today, and without the girls friendly chatter, I was being punished with awkward silence. Of course, now the two demons were both staring at me, which seemed even more awkward.

"Be quiet girl! Why must it always be talking with you? We are not obligated to-" Jaken yelled, flailing his arms as he was swatted harshly over the head.

"There is nothing to say." Sesshomaru responded coldly, regally tucking his hand beside him.

"There's always something." I mumbled, fiddling with my skirt. "It's torture sitting here listening to crickets."

"No one wants to talk to you. You little retch, the silence is welcomed!"

"I'd rather not listen to you either, Jaken!" I spat, glaring at the toad from across the flames. He opened his mouth in response, but a growl from

Sesshomaru instantly shut him up. And I was once again forced into silence.

"Forget it. I'll sleep." I muttered, standing and turning from the lord and his dragon claw.

"Your narrative is unnecessary, girl." Sesshomaru reprimanded, and I frowned. Apparently, I'd overstepped my boundaries.

That night my back faced camp, shielding me from the Lord and his new _sickening _arm. It was the first night since my coming here that I did not feel safe. Even in my dreams.

_They laugh around me. Scaled creatures, resembling lizards more than humans. Lizards, for dragons were proud beings. In my memory, while being fearful demons, the dragons were beautiful. These imps were neither. Yet their spears pricked me, the crowd around me cackling in jest._

_Darkness sweeps over me and I'm no longer amongst them. Instead I'm in his quarters, lying on his bed of fur. His yellow eyes glowing with lust, scaled hands tugging me closer. I bit my tongue, having learned earlier not to scream. His claws make rough paths underneath my skirt, beneath my kimonos, scratching the sensitive skin underneath._

_His voice is like poison to my ears, willing me to let loose passionate cries. But I remain silent. His touch will illicit nothing from me. My mind retreats into itself, my exterior nothing but a vacant mask. Inside, only inside, do I allow myself to scream._

I woke with a start, jolting forward. My face is a mix of sweat and tears, and I pant feeling my heart speed. The fires is out and my companions are sleeping, my lord nowhere to be found. I know I should stay, try to fall back into sleep, but I cannot.

The river is loud once I step further into the woods. I'd heard it earlier traveling in, and the water is all I seek. _Something to cleanse._

I knelt next to the river, splashing my face continually. I could feel the tears mix with the water, but it relieved nothing. I still saw his hungry stare when I closed my eyes. I still felt his sweaty claws gripping mine, slipping under my clothes. _Invading me._

My skin burned in remembrance and I stood without thinking. My legs, my thighs, everything was on fire. The months of suppressing my emotions, my feelings came flooding out from Jii-chans kindness. As I set aside the Kimono she'd gifted me with I stepped into the freezing water, splashing my bare chest and legs. The tears continued, streaming down my cheeks though I made no sound.

Once I'd finished, I stepped from the water, re-wrapping the kimono around my body, letting the silk cling to the dampness. Slowly I began walking back to camp, staring dully at my feet. There was a rustle of bushes and I turned upwards quickly.

Sesshomaru was the last person I expected to see, though he didn't look overwhelmingly surprised to see me there. We stared at each other for a moment, my eyes scanning to find what I hoped not to see, only to be surprised once more when I didn''t.

"That...thing." My mouth opened slightly and I cleared my throat. "The arm … where's it gone?" But the Lord only narrowed his eyes.

"You're supposed to be watching Rin." He said after a long moment of silence. I stared for a moment then nodded.

"She's sleeping...I needed a break." I retorted, continuing to walk. My mind told me I should have fought him and his master like statement. But my heart was tired. In that moment, I felt dead. Perhaps he sensed it.

"You're wet." His eyes fixated on the water dripping down my legs and face.

"Quit observant tonight, aren't we." It was a halfhearted comeback, muttered while brushing past him. But it was enough to annoy him. His claws bit into my skin as he jerked me backwards, my neck whipping as he forced me to face him. There was a burn in the recesses of his eyes, though I'd seen him more enraged.

"Your insolence will not be tolerated, human. Do not misjudge your place."

I stared back, silent. Not in fear. I wasn't sure what I felt then. My dead eyes stared back at his, the defiance present in my stance despite my attempts to be civil. When I moved to turn away he brought his hand from my arm to my chin, forcing me to stare into his golden eyes, growling low. It was animalistic and he meant to dominant me...like a dog leading his pack.

"I'm... not your... servant." I staggered the words, defying his primitive intimidation.

"Absurd." He replied, scowling as he released his grip on my chin, throwing me from him like the disgusting thing I was in his eyes. "Do you not take safety in my company? Do you not eat what I feed you? Follow where I command?" His icy glare found me once more. "If not a servant, human, what are you?

"I'm indebted." I grit my teeth, looking down as I found my footing, "I owe you...This is my only option..the only path for me currently...but I don't plan to stay with you forever." I felt his stare on me as I began walking, unable to figure out the emotions behind those cold eyes.

"I am not a charitable man, human." His steps were slow approaching. "You're mistaken if you think you're free to follow me with such intentions. Your usefulness must be proved, or you will be dismissed."

I felt the grave error in my words, frowning. What was I doing, angering a man of such power. I bowed slowly and deeply, eyes dead and fixed on the ground in front of me. "I...have nowhere else to go."

"Then act accordingly." I stayed bowed, watching Sesshomaru move past me. "Do not expect this free ride."

I straightened slowly, gazing at the Lords straight back through blurring eyes. Walking in defeat back to camp, earlier words echoed through my mind.

_I have nowhere else to go._

* * *

**A/N: **Hope you all enjoyed that chapter. It was a good two pages longer than my normal chapters. 9 to be exact. Things should get more interesting in the coming chapters, rest assured!


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